Tag Archives: Canada

I am 30.

I did something drastic on my 30th. I had my hair trimmed short. Well, it should have been more short but the stylist told me it’s too drastic. So, I let him decide for the length. (Pixie, short hairstyle became an “in” thing recently.) And so here it is…

changeIt felt so light and really refreshing! heheheh…

I don’t look 30, right? 🙂

But I’m grateful to even reach 30. It’s a blessing to be able to live 30 years. Just imagine living another 30 years, really long right? Life is indeed a blessing. But to live a fruitful life is much much more. And I owe everything to God who truly has been faithful in allowing me to live an abundant and fruitful 30 years.

The best gift God has given me this year is the opportunity to go back to Canada and start a new life there. It is a granted dream and answered prayer. Indeed, God does not withhold good things to those who love Him. Why would He? He is good and generous. He gives the best and He is the best Giver.

The best gift God has given me in my whole existence is His love and grace through Jesus Christ. That, I can never trade for anything, even my dream. I’m totally sold out to Jesus. I can’t imagine living another 30 years without Jesus in my life. I just can’t. Indeed, His word is true that apart from Him, I am nothing.

The second best gift God has given me are people. I am grateful to be able to see other parts of the world, experience the good things – but those would be worthless if I didn’t get to share those with different people that God has put in my life. My 30th year got sweeter because of the relationships that God has sustained and for new people that He has added into my life. They say that the only thing you can bring to heaven are people. And so, I’d rather invest on people than on material things. I want to see them all in heaven.

I’m looking forward to an exciting journey as I enter a new phase in my life. I’m just comforted with God’s promise that in this journey, He is walking beside me, ahead of me and behind me.

I am 30. I am forever secure in His presence.

To God be all the praise and glory!

——————————–0———————————

Cheers to all 30’s and beyond!!

IMG_2239

 

Asking for MORE

Last year, I asked God to test my faith. Not to give me what I want but to see more of Him. I get to know God more each day when I read the Bible but I wanted more. I wanted to know and experience God more in my own walk with Him. And so, I prayed for Him to take me to a more deep faith.

That’s 5 “more” there…

Just like when Elisha asked Elijah a double portion of his spirit, I asked God for more of Him.

Just rewinding a bit in 2012…

God gave me this burden to consider going for a full time ministry work. It is a privileged joy to be able to serve God fulltime.  However, I also wanted to fulfill my own dreams for myself and for my family. I can’t see my dream getting realized if I’ll go fulltime.

In a retreat that year, we were asked to write something that we want to surrender to the Lord. Right there, God asked me to surrender my plans and dreams to Him, to just totally let go. It broke my heart. As I wrote and committed it to the Lord, I was in tears. I felt like a portion of me was taken away.

After that, I just told God, I have done my part, now do Yours.

Forwarding to 2013…

There were no doors opened for a full time ministry work. God even gave me a better opportunity for growth in my IT career. It was a dream role I never thought I could have. I thought maybe God wanted me to stay after all. I got so energized with my work that somehow I forgot that desire of going full time for a ministry.

Then latter part of the year, a door for a ministry job opened. Work in my company became stressful and “spiritually” exhausting. I applied for the ministry opportunity. I considered resigning.

Not certain if I’ll be accepted for the position, I took a big leap of faith and submitted my resignation. And on my last day at work, I received the news for my ministry application that I was not accepted.

That’s what happened when you asked God to test your faith. Things don’t go your way. But it allowed me to experience God in a very, very, very personal way. Indeed, He wanted me to grow deeper in my faith.

I asked God why He wanted me to resign when He knew that I will not be accepted for that ministry. The response I got from Him – your character, your heart, more important than where you will serve me. The condition of my heart was not pleasing to Him anymore. Disgusting enough that God, full of grace and love had to remove me from something I might not be able to handle.

As I started 2014, I have never been more uncertain with my life. But that’s when deeper faith happens. All I know is that I have a SOVEREIGN GOD who cares for my heart more than what I can bring to Him.

Remember that dream I surrendered in 2012? Years before that, I wanted to apply for a permanent residency in Canada. However, I did not make it to the 2 years of full work experience. I got short of 3 months. I told God that if He really wanted me to apply, He will find another way. Start of 2013, the qualification changed. From 2 years, they only required 1 year. I was qualified. Then, hesitation came. I told God I surrendered this dream to Him already. I’m choosing to go full time.

But God is just amazing. He used someone to push me to apply. Did you ever have that peace that transcends all understanding? I had this sudden peace in me, confirming that I’m doing the right thing. Amazingly, everything went so smooth with my application. And with all the uncertainties I had at the start of the year, I received an email last February. My application for Canada got approved.

I gave God a jaw-dropping expression (literally). A face in awe of SOMEONE I can never fathom and describe but very real, very personal.

I’m excited how this year will turn out to be. 2013 has been a very interesting, growing, exciting year for me. This year, I’m just letting God continue to mold me, surprise me, amaze me, change me. After all, that’s just the way HE is – An Extravagant, Loving Father.

Last year, my theme verse was Hebrews 11:1 as God took me to a deeper faith.  Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.”

I started this year – no job, plans surrendered, and full of uncertainties. I was only holding on to the ONE certainty in my life, my Lord and Savior Jesus.

This is my theme verse for 2014 – Philippians 3:7-8: “But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ.What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. “

Please pray for me as I seek God to give me a fresh vision before I leave for Canada. More than a fulfilled dream, this journey has always been about Him. I just want to make sure that when I move, I have a clear vision to remind me of why I went there in the first place.

Thank you to everyone who prayed with me on this journey. (Philippians 1:3 – “I thank my God every time I remember you.”)

In this life, it only takes a faith as small as a mustard seed to believe that God loves you so much and He cares about you that He wants to be involved in all aspects of your life. God will not force you. You have to decide if you want to believe. (And, I hope you do.)

To the only amazing God be all the glory!

cover2

It’s Not Complicated

 

In my Bible reading, I’m now in the chapters of the Book of Exodus when God gave instruction to Moses in building the tabernacle, altar, etc. You know all the details and measurements. Every time I read these chapters, I’m always reminded of how God cares even to the smallest details. He was very specific of the color, size and length and materials to be used. The small details mattered to Him. Another thing I’m also reminded of, God is not complicated. When He gave the instruction to Moses, it was direct and complete, no guessing games or whatsoever.

As I reflect of who God is also in my life, He is also the same. He cares for the smallest details in my life. I remembered when I was trying to catch the last bus trip and I was still in the train. With my estimate, I know I will miss the bus but I asked for a little miracle from God. I made it to the last trip. I realized God cared for my transportation going home. There have been a lot of instances in my life that I never thought would matter to God, but every time I whisper a prayer, He would give me those little miracles which made me love God more. Indeed, He is also into the small details of our life.

If there’s such thing as “It’s Complicated” status in Facebook, with God, nothing is complicated. How He gave instruction to Moses, everything was laid out. Moses did not need to figure out what God was trying to say to Him. God gave all the details for Moses to execute. In my journey with God, He has shown the same. His yes is a clear yes and no a clear no. We sometimes think that God’s plan for us is something that we need to figure out or it’s a mystery. As I learn to totally trust Him, I realized that there is nothing to figure out. All we really need to do is to trust and obey. God gives answers in the proper time. And when He answers, it is always clear.

Last week, I became impatient with God. He asked me to resign last year and I thought that He would let me work full time in my church. The first position I applied, I was not selected. Another position was offered to me, I got excited and I thought this was what God really planned for me. Then, I was told last week that the start date was uncertain due to change of priorities.  I felt sad and cried. I was being a brat with God asking what He really wanted me to do. God was giving me a clear “No”. Twice. Very clear, right? And so, I conceded.

But God does not give us a “No” answer for no reason at all. Last Saturday, I received the email that I have been waiting for a long time. It was for my PR application in Canada, the immigration is requesting for my passport so that they could give me my visa. This was something I prayed to God and deeply asked Him not to give me a “No”.  And indeed, He did not! My application got approved! 🙂 And now, everything is making sense!

His No to me is a Yes to what is best for me and for His work for the church. God is not complicated. We are the ones making it complicated because of our impatience and lack of faith.

“God is not a God of disorder but of peace.” 1 Corinthians 14:33

Delays are not denials

As I shared in my previous blogs, I was working on my PR application for Canada with all the requirements and stuff.

I’m happy to say that I made it to the required score for my IELTS exam! Praise God for that! Just a little story about it – I was really nervous that I would fail especially my listening exam. It’s really where I was struggling the most when I was doing my self reviews. I was more confident with my writing and speaking since I believe they were my strengths. And you know what, I got the lowest in my writing. I was actually expecting it because I really got stuck in my writing when I can’t even properly elaborate my thoughts about a topic that I totally have no idea! I realized how difficult to write about something you really don’t know anything about. But as always, God is really good. I needed a 6 for my writing and He gave me a 6! 🙂 That was really close. I placed everything in God’s hands after I took the exam.

I already submitted my PR application. It was really a challenging process with all the documents and requirements that I need to procure. Not to forget the very tedious details that I should follow in the instruction kit. But really really helpful. After a month of submitting my application, I got my application number. Yay! 🙂

I’ve been expecting their next updates after 2 months I got my application number but I haven’t heard still. There has been an ongoing strike in the immigration offices which could possibly cause the delays. But then, I told myself, God’s timetable is always perfect. His timing is always right. While I’m waiting for the next update, I still have enough time to prepare for what’s to come. And if this is really what God would want me to have, it will happen.

I was reminded by a status post in FB and I really agree, indeed, God’s delays are not God’s denials. He holds what lies ahead. He knows what’s best. As long as we are aligned to His will, we will learn to wait by faith.

Please pray for me as I press on to this journey. 🙂

God bless!

Through HIM

It was only last week that I finally made a decision to process my application of PR for Canada. I had this sudden peace to make such decision and somehow found some hope. I need to take the IELTS exam as part of the immigration requirements. Tomorrow, I will be submitting my registration form and will be scheduled for the exam. I need to take the exams on March 9 so that I could still make it to the cut off for my application for PR. I need to complete everything before April or else, I would miss my chance. I shouldn’t be applying for PR because right now, I don’t really see myself wanting to live there. However, when I had a conversation with Emily, a Filipino friend in Canada, I found some hope on it. It made me think that anything could possibly change in the next year.

Before I went back to Manila last year, I really wanted to apply for PR. It’s just that I wasn’t eligible back then. It required 2 years of fulltime experience and I only had 1 year and 9 months. Fortunately, just this January, they changed it to 1 year only. I was telling God before that if it is really His will for me to apply for PR, He will make a way for me. And I believe this is a chance that God wants me to take. You see, I still don’t hear God assuring me that I will really be moving to Canada. But God is teaching me to start making big decisions again. I’m not a risk-taker. I like to be sure always. And I know that this application is another test of my faith to Him. I trust that tomorrow when I set a schedule for IELTS, I will be able to get the March 9 schedule. It is only through God that this will be possible. As what the blind man that Jesus healed said that if Jesus is not from God, He could do nothing. Same also for us, apart from God, we can only experience the normal, not the impossible. It is only through God that we are able to enjoy not just the blessings but His very presence, His character, His power, His favor.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5

Written Jan. 22, 2013

Looking Back

 

It’s the last month of the year. My favorite time of the year – lights, caroling, decorations are just everywhere. Anywhere you look seems so happy and vibrant. I just can’t help but smile and feel good. Also, this month is much looked forward to as well. I missed spending two Christmases with my family. I’m just excited to go home.

I can’t imagine how the months this year had swiftly passed by. My memories of last Christmas are still very fresh in my thoughts. And as I look back what had happened in the past months, I can’t help but be amazed.

My first 3 months of this year were a bit heartbreaking for me. My heart was really torn. I was excited coming home here in Manila but at the same time I didn’t want to leave Canada.  I wished I can just travel back and forth anytime I want. When I arrived here, a lot has changed big time. And I felt like I’m a stranger even in my own apartment. It took me awhile to be able to adjust again.

And then a lot of things happened in between the year which I never expected. I was even telling God that if ever I would be asked to go back to Canada, I might say no. 🙂 I’ve met new and old friends. I’ve built new relationships. I’ve grown in my walk by being part of a ministry. I’ve been serving God to the extent that I never had done before. I saw the bigger picture which I never imagined when I went through a tough time in Canada.  When I had so many questions last year, God answered all of them this year. And everything perfectly made sense to me.

What am I trying to say? God does not allow things to happen in our life without a reason. God is not a happy go lucky. He always have the best plan for all of us. We may not know it for now, it may take a while for us to know. But for sure one day, He will make you understand why. A little faith on a BIG GOD is enough to just trust and wait.

How about you? How was your 2012? 🙂

All I can say, to God be all the glory for everything that had happened this year in my life. This year has been a very overwhelming journey with the Lord.

Cheers! 🙂