Tag Archives: faith

Through HIM

It was only last week that I finally made a decision to process my application of PR for Canada. I had this sudden peace to make such decision and somehow found some hope. I need to take the IELTS exam as part of the immigration requirements. Tomorrow, I will be submitting my registration form and will be scheduled for the exam. I need to take the exams on March 9 so that I could still make it to the cut off for my application for PR. I need to complete everything before April or else, I would miss my chance. I shouldn’t be applying for PR because right now, I don’t really see myself wanting to live there. However, when I had a conversation with Emily, a Filipino friend in Canada, I found some hope on it. It made me think that anything could possibly change in the next year.

Before I went back to Manila last year, I really wanted to apply for PR. It’s just that I wasn’t eligible back then. It required 2 years of fulltime experience and I only had 1 year and 9 months. Fortunately, just this January, they changed it to 1 year only. I was telling God before that if it is really His will for me to apply for PR, He will make a way for me. And I believe this is a chance that God wants me to take. You see, I still don’t hear God assuring me that I will really be moving to Canada. But God is teaching me to start making big decisions again. I’m not a risk-taker. I like to be sure always. And I know that this application is another test of my faith to Him. I trust that tomorrow when I set a schedule for IELTS, I will be able to get the March 9 schedule. It is only through God that this will be possible. As what the blind man that Jesus healed said that if Jesus is not from God, He could do nothing. Same also for us, apart from God, we can only experience the normal, not the impossible. It is only through God that we are able to enjoy not just the blessings but His very presence, His character, His power, His favor.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5

Written Jan. 22, 2013

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The Response

God has been using people or events to speak to me. But more than that, He speaks through His Words from the Bible. My desire to go full time has been an on and off thing since I started my serious walk with the Lord. God would put it in my heart, then, He would remove it.  On those times that I would desire for it, I would always ask God – how. And I really didn’t get any answers during those times. He would just slowly remove the desire from my heart.

Looking back, it was only last year that I understood the heart of God on His will for me. We can never serve God fully when there is a non-repented sin in our lives. I wish I can talk about it everything here but this is not about me. I want to talk how God has changed me.  God is slow to anger. He does not look at us according to our own iniquities but according to His love and compassion. He does not keep a record of our wrongdoings. He forgives. He restores. He heals. He delivers. He gives us a new heart. He makes us a new creation. What God always wanted from me was a broken and contrite heart. Something that I thought I could never give to Him. I was scared because it would be very painful. But what I learned about God, He will never let go of you until you return to Him with your whole heart – doesn’t matter how broken it may be. At the time of brokenness, God changed me. His forgiveness and grace became my strength. His Word became alive, pierced me to the deepest. God set me free.

The joy and freedom of serving God with a repented life is truly incomparable. Now, I understand why God didn’t answer me before.

Going back to my desperate prayer, on that same day, God who is so full of grace and abounding in love used Miss Jane, a CCF fulltime worker to speak to me. She asked me if I already applied in CCF. I was surprised, well, because I didn’t know that Rhodes mentioned it to her. What I was really amazed was the wisdom that she imparted to me. She didn’t push me to apply to CCF, but instead, she told me that if it is really my calling, then maybe I should start first in going to a seminary. God doesn’t just drop things at your doorstep without any reason. It was a reminder for me that I have to prepare, just as He asked me to. I’m praying about IGSL. I feel intimidated. I feel incapable. I feel lacking. I still worry – the ongoing thing. Now that I’m praying about IGSL, I have new concerns with God. And you know what? God will always respond.

Written on Jan. 20, 2013

My Faith Journey

Written on Jan. 20, 2013

My theme verse for this year is Hebrews 11:1, “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”  Faith is a gift from God. It enables us to trust Him. But at this time of my life, I can sense God testing my faith. I can feel His hands pushing my faith beyond what I am used to. And I realize how small my faith is; which makes me even more grateful that I have a BIG GOD.

If you are reading this, it’s because I want you to be a part of this journey. And most importantly, it’s because I need your prayers and encouragements. Just like what Solomon said, “Two are better than one…” I’m grateful to God for blessing me with people like you.

A Volunteer’s Journal

If you look back at your life 12 months ago, will you be able to say that you’ve changed a lot as a person?  Every end of the year, some might say time flew so fast or to some the year seemed so long. Truth is, how the days passed by 10 years ago or thousand years ago had no difference to how they passed by a year ago. Looks like how we view it is always relative to how we have lived our lives.

Last year, just a week before this weekend, I participated as one of the facilitators of the Singles@Work Conference entitled, “Pursue Love”.  God revealed Himself during that conference by teaching me to be more trustful and to be humble. He used different situations that time to remind not just me but I believe all the volunteers the importance of prayer and humility.

And just this weekend, I had the same privilege of serving God as a volunteer again for another S@W conference entitled, “Purpose Driven”.  If I compare this year’s conference to last year, I must say that this year has really improved a lot and is much better.  Though somehow, that should always be the goal. To always improve.

But then, I realized that comparison should not be based on how the event had turned out. What should be compared is how the volunteers have changed.  How the event was implemented was really because of the condition of the heart, mind and soul of God’s workers because God never changed.

This conference is no different to the other events that the ministry has organized. Because every event has one purpose and that is to make Jesus known. And as we all share our own gifts to God’s work, we get to see how God could really orchestrate every detail for His work.  The differences that each volunteer had were used by God for His perfect plan. And to be able to see that as I worked behind the scene was truly amazing.

My main take home for this conference was really to see the heart of each volunteer that I’ve never seen in the previous events that we had. I can’t speak for how each one has prepared for this event or even how much was changed in them as compared to last year or in every event organized. I can only speak for myself.  I’ve become more patient, more trusting to the Lord, more loving and more prayerful.

As for the rest of the volunteers, I don’t know what changed but all I can say is I’ve seen growth. I’m truly blessed to serve God with brothers and sisters in Christ who are so passionate for the Lord. As I ponder last night how amazing the event has turned out, I realize that God was not just working in the hearts of the participants but as well as in every heart of the volunteer.

All glory to the Father through the Lord Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior!

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Ministry: Singles@Work – https://www.facebook.com/singlesatwork

Confessions of a Sinner

Over the weekend, I just found myself feeling really alone. The past weeks were really tiring with work but it didn’t remove the joy in my heart. I was enjoying my work. But starting this weekend, I felt I was really slowly going down. I could not understand the condition of my heart. It seems empty and full at the same time.

I tried  praying so hard and pushed my self to read the Bible just to find comfort and to feel good. But, it didn’t work. I got so distracted with other things and my mind got tired of thinking what is wrong with me.

You see, I have moments like this in my life when all of a sudden I tend to get so emotional. Then, I start losing focus on God and start focusing on the desires of my heart. Instead of allowing the Holy Spirit to pull my self up from the pit, I pull myself down even more. I admit that this weekend, I let my self just go down. I know God is letting me face something but I was just so tired in dealing with it. I just want to do things my way.

But, big BUT… God is simply amazing. His patience and compassion is just endless on me. He will do everything so that I will return to Him regardless of the condition of my heart. I was reading the book entitled, “Growing Deep in God” (by Edmund Chan) and it focused on prayer. There were 2 paragraphs there which really affirmed my heart’s condition. God has been rebuking on me already about it but I just ignored. But, God loves me so much He would even use a book to rebuke me again.

Here’s what God reminded me. The ones with comments in the side.

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I realized why I was so lazy reading God’s Word. Because I want to read to feel good and be comforted. And because I felt that it hasn’t been like that, I was doing my quiet time out of obligation when I should read because I love Jesus so much that I’m just thrilled to know more about Him.  I now understand why my prayer life is becoming a duty rather than a delight. It’s because it has been about me when it should be about God.

My heart hasn’t been right. My mind even. My perspective shifted because of too much distractions. Slowly, I focused on myself instead of focusing on God.

God knows what’s in my heart right now. The fact that God is always committed to me despite my weaknesses gives me a reason to go back to Him. I’m just grateful for a God who is always true and faithful.

I pray that I will be more delighted in prayer and His Word because it’s always about Him.

28: last few hours

I really don’t have anything in mind to write about. It’s just that I want to write something before I turn 29 tomorrow. Just to put a closure to my series of 28 blogs, though, I haven’t really written much. Or should I say, I’ve really been busy being 28? 😀

I was excited when I turned 28 last year. I just wanted to embrace it. But truth is, it’s not really about age. It’s just a number. It’s just a marker, I believe. Like, when I was 28, I experienced parasailing. Or, it was when I was 28 that I joined this ministry. It’s just easier to remember when numbers are involved. 😀

So, what’s up with being 29? 29 people and older – you tell me. 😀

This is my last year being in the 20’s. I used to wonder when I was much younger if I would ever reach the age of 30. I don’t mind counting my age. It’s a milestone for me as a year is added to my life. It’s a blessing from the Lord. It’s actually a miracle to be able to get through another year and still intact with my faith. It’s all God’s doing. 😀

I don’t have definite plans for my birthday. As much as I wish my family is here, I’m still grateful for what God has set for me on my day.

As I desire to grow more in faith this 2013, hope that you pray for me as I take steps of faith each day to really know what God has willed for me this year.

All glory and praises and thanks to God for 29 years and more. 😀

Cheers! God bless you!
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28: A Little Push

Just this September, I was blessed with 2 weeks of vacation. A vacation that my friend, Anni and I had been planning even before I left Vancouver. Anni was visiting Philippines for the first time and we made sure she maximizes her whole stay. Well, I really hope she did. (Looks like… 😀 )

Just to back track a little bit, January of this year, I got challenged by Anni to do snowboarding. You can read my story – Overcoming Fear. I never wanted to do it because I felt like I might just injure myself and I simply can’t do it. But she somehow believed I might be able to do it. So, I took the challenge. Well, no regrets, so far.

Now, back to our September trip. We really had so much fun in the different places that we’ve been to. But as for me, my favorite would really be in Boracay. Anni wanted to try all the water sports, doesn’t matter how extreme it could be. She loves some challenge. I, myself, was never a risk taker. I like activities within my control. But when you’re with someone who is so excited in doing challenging things, it could get contagious. Well, except for one that she couldn’t really make me do – helmet diving. Big NO because I’m a bit claustrophobic.

It’s good to have someone who could give you that little kick and push to make you go out of your comfort zone, especially when you travel. 🙂 It’s not like someone is forcing you to do something you don’t want to do. It’s having someone believing in you that you can do it. Or else, you would miss all the fun. 🙂

Just like our Heavenly Father, He sometimes gives us a little push on our faith so that we take that step out of our comfort zone. It is only when we take that step that we will see what God was preparing for us. If you feel like no one believes in who you can be and what you can accomplish, trust that God does.

 “Be strong. Take courage. Don’t be intimidated. Don’t give them a second thought because God, your God, is striding ahead of you. He’s right there with you. He won’t let you down; he won’t leave you.” – Deut 31:6

No matter what kind of travel you are in right now, important is you try to conquer whatever it is that is hindering you to your destination. And if you know someone who needs to hear the words, “I believe in you.”, be sensitive and sincere. The power of encouragement can really make a difference. And I’m always grateful to God for the people around me who continue to encourage and believe in me.  🙂

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Here’s a glimpse of some of our Boracay adventures. I was really scared to do the para sailing but when we were at the top, I don’t want to go down anymore. I really enjoyed it. 🙂